Ms. Hatch's Fourth Grade Class at Wellston Elementary

Earlier this month, Heather Rouba, Mrs. Oklahoma County America 2009, contacted me about speaking to elementary school students at Wellston Elementary. Heather and I have the same platform and the same mission, to advocate on behalf of children of divorce and help couples create healthy, happy marriages. We also have one more thing in common: we are both adult children of divorce. She and I had been corresponding for a while so it was wonderful to finally meet her in person! I also spoke to the school principal about implementing a chapter of Banana Splits, and he is interested. Hopefully, a teacher or other school staff member will feel moved to do this and children of divorce at Wellston Elementary will begin to get the help they need after divorce.

Today I spoke to a classroom of fourth graders about the tough issues of divorce and remarriage, about feelings and how to cope with them, and also about self-esteem and goal-setting. Then I spent quite a while signing autograph cards (many children asked for an autographed photo for their brothers, sisters, and even parents!). I shared my personal story and encouraged the children to make good choices and set goals to make their dreams a reality. Every student participated in our conversation and I think they learned a lot about coping and making their dreams come true. I also had more than one conversation about 'being famous' and about whether or not my crown is 'real.' :) I said, "It's made of real rhinestones." :) The children were adorable and insightful and I appreciate their candor. Many children told me that their parents are divorced and that they were glad that we talked about it -- It's a tough issue, and I wished that I could talk to them all in more detail, but hopefully knowing that Mrs. Oklahoma is someone who has been there and experienced what they experienced helps them to realize that even though it can be hard, that it doesn't have to hurt forever and that they can still make their dreams come true.

Heather and I will be back at Wellston Elementary on March 11 to speak at a school-wide assembly. I'm excited and nervous about the prospect of this (I've never spoken to an entire school before!) but I'm certain it will be fun! I also hope that we will implement a program at Wellston. I think it is wonderful to be a role model, but I think it would be even more wonderful to leave a legacy. I want all children get the help they need after parental divorce, whether I'm there to speak with them or not. It's exciting to be a part of change like this, disheartening to hear that almost every child in that classroom is struggling, but encouraging to know that we're trying to do something about it.

At an OMI event, a volunteer told a story about a man who was throwing star fish back into the ocean. A storm had brought in many star fish, and left on the shore they would die. One at a time, the man threw one star fish after another into the ocean. Someone approached him saying, "Surely, you know that you won't be able to save them all. In the grand scheme of things, your attempt won't matter." Then, picking up another star fish, the man responded, "It will matter to this one." I know that we won't be able to reach every child in Oklahoma, but what we do will matter to individual children and individual families. That makes it all worth it.